Friday, June 30, 2006

Somebody Stage an Intervention!

Having a laptop is like having Charlotte's Rabbit on 'Sex and the City.' I am so addicted to this damn thing one of you is going to have to come over to my house and remove me bodily from it.

Actually I'm at the library because I don't have wifi at home. But I have I-Tunes! I am currently uploading all of my music to I-Tunes. It's going to be sad sad sad to see how much music I have. This is what I do with my free time. But the stuff I'm going to be able to burn....!

Sigh.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

I Love Aunting...and Other Stuff

So I'm now a non-biological aunt to three lovely girls - first Emily and Lillian Vincent, and the brand-new (and very cute) Rachael Alexandria Bessert. She was born about six weeks early to Chris and Linda Bessert and is being taken care of at St Mary's in Grand Rapids. When you're ready to enter the world, I guess nothing is gonna stop you. Like, eh, due dates, bedroom readiness and preplanned baby showers. This will be a fun story to tell her when she's older. ?Anyway, congrats, Mom and Dad! She's a cutie!

I love aunting. I can shower the girls with gifts (because after all I am a biological aunt to the oh-so-adorable Isabelle - okay, technically a first cousin once removed, but honestly, that's just too freakin hard to say) and hand them back when they're stinky!! This is the way to go, folks. Spoil 'em, hand 'em back. Sleep through the night. (Except when the cat is standing on your chest, but that's another story.) I recommend aunting for everyone! Uncling works too. And I think I just invented two words. Hey, whatever.

Random thoughts:
- Being unemployed really doesn't suck. It's like every day is Saturday. Until you get the credit card bill with the new laptop listed on it.
- Driving and listening to Lewis Black on CD is, in short, a recipe for a car accident. At the very least don't drink anything because you'll shoot beverage out your nose and all over the windshield.
- The movie 'Boondock Saints' contains all sorts of things I don't like. Men who work in a meat-packing plant. Same men who smoke. Same men who are involved in the death of a cat (quick so the cat didn't feel a thing). Murder and blood. And yet, the peacoat, t-shirt and jeans combination has never been hotter. I think it's time for Sean Patrick Flannery to go back on the Meal Plan in whatever vacancy I have. (I thought he was hot back in his "Young Indy" days. I think he's aging well. Very well. Even when chained to a toilet in a dirty bathrobe. I SO need dates.) Yeah, yeah, yeah, I understand the gun as a phallic symbol. And I think that's why men with guns can be very hot. Irish men with guns too. (Lisa, you're in, right? If only they were cowboys to boot...) I'm stopping here. For your sake.
- Local congressman Fred Upton made the Daily Show the other day for making Pong noises during discussions on video games and safety. Way to go, Freddie! Beep, boop, bip to you too!

I have no tip of the day. It's obvious I've just lost my mind. I'll let you know when I get it back.

Sunday, June 18, 2006

This Is Why People Go To Cell Phones

When I signed up for my phone service ages ago, I had one company for local, and one for long distance. Well, recently the two of them merged. That's pertinent to the story I'm going to tell about Why People Go To Cell Phones instead of land lines.

I decided since I had a cell phone with long distance included that I needed to cancel my land line long distance to save money. So I called said company and told them I wanted to cancel my service. They transferred me several times, each to a polite person apparently working in an entirely different section of the country, each of whom tried to sell me other services or convince me of why I didn't want to cancel the service, which resulted in me being snippy after a while. I also had to cancel some features on my local service, and I got switched around again to a couple of people who went through the same spiel and tried to sell me stuff, which just resulted in me losing my cool with each of them and becoming, in short, a total bitch. Finally they agreed to cut the services. I was on the phone at least 15-20 minutes each time I had to call.

Well, I get a letter in the mail saying my long distance had been cancelled but I should be sure to talk to my local service provider to make sure they know I've cancelled it too. Since I've now talked to at least 10 people (that's what it seemed like anyway) from all over Timbuktu, and the two companies are now the same company, so the ads on TV tell us, I figure I'm all set.

Until I get a bill for last month's (unused, so they charge you a fee) long distance. I have to call and arm wrestle another guy who gets the brunt of my fury, but waives those fees. Then he tries to hook me up with a local guy (the two arms of the company still operate separately, despite what you've heard) and the 'local' guy can't help either of us. So he finally tracks down a person who can cancel the long distance service on the local end, gets it cancelled, and then tells me, whenever you cancel a service with a company, THEY CHARGE YOU A FEE. I'm paying Nine Bucks to cancel my long distance, which I cancelled TO SAVE MONEY.

In short, as I told this unfortunate fellow (who was very polite), this is why people go to their cell phones for all their service. And I told him when I reinstate land line long distance, if I ever do, I'm not using his company ever again. He tells me all land line services charge you these fees. Again, this is why people use their cell phones. One flat fee, you know what's included, and that's that. Argh!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

TV Season Wrapup

So it's taken me a while to get back to the library to do the computer thing. I have three interviews this week. Today's was a meet-and-greet so no job, but the next two have promise.

TV Season Wrapup - the few tidbits I didn't get to yet. Yes, Mike, you're right. I watch more TV than most human beings. I blame it on being single.

Top Stupid Mistakes of the TV Season:

- Killing off Tony Almeida on 24 - You couldn't send the guy out in a blaze of bullets saving a puppy or something? After all he's done for the show, he gets a syringe in the chest trying to avenge his wife's death? And since Edgar dies in the next episode, everybody gets all weepy about Edgar!! Are you people on crack??? Tony is the bigger badder better hero, and next season will just plain suck without him.

- CSI Miami's outlandish plots - Now you know I like this show, despite its flaws. I like David Caruso's offbeat Horatio Caine, and I like the setting. Miami has its own personality and that helps drive the show. That said, what's this crap about the mole? DO I CARE??? NO! I didn't even know what the problem was with the mole situation until the last episode, the whole thing was so stinking vague. So when Eva LaRue copped to being the mole, I was like 'eh.' And the whole 'Horatio gets married to Delko's hot sister' thing was so sudden and suddenly stupid I knew she'd get axed in the last episode, and since I didn't really care that much about her or the sham marriage, I didn't care she was dead. For heaven's sake, when she and H have lunch together and tell each other they love each other, it's so worthless you know it's just dialogue, and then he doesn't kiss her when he gets up from the table. Freakin' weird, people.

- Lost killing off the strong women - The show needs MORE strong women, not LESS. I'd even started to like Shannon before she bought it. Now I'm waiting for Sun to kick somebody's ass and soon. You can't count on Kate to do it. She just looks worried about her past or pleased when Sawyer and Jack fight over her. They oughta both find somebody else to moon over. She's boring the crap out of me right now.

- Trying to fool the dogs on Prison Break - Michael Scofield might be freakin' brilliant, but he knows nothing about dogs. Here's a tip, Michael - Brussels sprouts and manure will NOT fool a tracking dog's nose. His sense of smell is zillions times better than yours or mine. We shed skin cells every second, so rubbing Brussels sprouts in your bed isn't going to hide the scent you leave behind as you walk around unless you scrub yourself and everything else in bleach and wear a full body suit like nuclear technicians. You CAN fool the dog by walking in a stream or lake, since scent doesn't carry on water. That's what I would have recommended for the escapees as a way to give themselves distance from the pursuing police.

Top Wasted Actors:

- Alfre Woodard on Desperate Housewives - It's criminal to underuse a woman of such talent. She should have been in every episode. Give me less of Susan falling down or doing something stupid, and less of Gabrielle's selfishness, Carlo's stupidity, and Lynette chasing around her dumb-dumb husband and her dumber-dumber boss.

- Emily Proctor on CSI Miami - Is she just there to be stoic and supportive? Or deal with her alcoholic dad and that's all? Give Bullet Girl more to do next season, people, and give her some personality! And add Khandi Alexander (Alex) to that too. She's a tough gal and I like her, even when she talks to the corpses - ESPECIALLY because she talks to the corpses. More Calleigh and Alex! (Best Calleigh line of the series (season one I think): they're investigating a sniper shooting from the roof of a skyscraper, and H says "What do you get when you have a six foot tall man laying down with a three foot long weapon?" Calleigh's response: "Hot flashes. But that's just me.")

- Gary Sinise on CSI NY - The guy's a genius and he's cute to boot. (I have a TV crush on Gary Sinise. I can't explain it. Shoot me.) So what's he doing on this show? Standing around with a flashlight, most of the time. Mac Taylor needs a personality, and like, yesterday. Even Melina Kanakeredes got an episode with an abusive ex boyfriend where she got to emote. Mac Taylor doesn't emote at all. I think he's made of wood. (No jokes, Mike.)

Coolest Themes:

- Veronica Mars - Hands down, the Dandy Warhols' 'We Used to Be Friends' is priceless. Download now! Legally, so I'm not getting sued!

- CSI Miami - You gotta love the Roger Daltry scream at the beginning (usually comes after Caine puts on his sunglasses and says something about kicking someone's ass), and the choice of the Who's 'We Don't Get Fooled Again'. Best CSI theme, no question. And what's with some of these shows not using themes at all? Lost, Invasion and Supernatural all did it. Now, Supernatural does get the Honorable Mention for use of Music, as they used two Rush tunes in their first few episodes. Rock on in that black Impala, boys. Then come visit me.

Thursday, June 01, 2006

TV Season Cont - Top 5 Underappreciated Heroes

I really need something else to do with my time, but as you can see, I don't have it.

The Top 5 Underappreciated Heroes of the past TV season!

5. Rex Linn as Frank on CSI Miami - This guy brings a splash of Southern business to the CSI:Miami team, making him a good foil for the occasionally overacting-prone David Caruso (who I still like on this show, overacting or not). Somebody make Linn a regular cast member! I keep worrying someone is going to kill him off. And dammit, I like Frank. DO YOU HEAR ME, CSI MIAMI? FRANK ROCKS! Now they really are going to kill him off...*sigh*

4. The Halliwell Sisters (Holly Marie Combs as Piper, Alyssa Milano as Phoebe, and Rose McGowan as Paige) on Charmed - Whether or not you like the cult show is beyond the point. It occasionally cribs heavily from other series and movies, but you gotta love a story about three devoted sisters and their real-life troubles (kids and love lives, usually with very cute men) and the mystical ones (being powerful witches). And all in a kick-ass house that frequently gets blown up. And a happy ending. And a lot of "There's no way you could wear that to work!" - wait, that last one is me, usually commenting on Alyssa Milano's clothes. (As a PS - my niece got the middle name Paige sort of inadvertantly from the show, but I have to say, if she grows up to be like Paige I would be very proud - Paige is upbeat, smart, compassionate, friendly and a good sister - all things I hope for, for Isabelle.)

3. Amaury Nolasco as Sucre on Prison Break - He puts up with all of Scofield's scientific hoo-ha, all so he can go home to his girl and their baby. He does whatever he has to to help the process, including 'hanging the sheet' which is a signal to other prisoners that you're, um, busy. It was a tough call between him and Rockmond Dunbar as C-Note, who gets an honorable mention for coming up with the mother of all "I'm not in Jail honey" stories - he keeps telling his wife he's in Iraq. AND SHE BUYS IT. Maybe he ought to be single after all, if she's that stupid.

2. Tina Majorino as Mac on Veronica Mars - Forget her role in Napolean Dynamite! She frequently saves the day on this show, and even tried to sleep with a murderer, although she didn't know it at the time (poor girl, I wanted her to have dates, but with Beaver? Who turned out to be a killer?). She was switched at birth with a snotty cheerleader, who ended up with the house with money, but she's not bitter about it. And if she wasn't around, who would Veronica turn to for her professional computer hacking? An episode is always better if Mac is in it (and if Logan is making snotty comments to Veronica, but that's another story altogether.)

1. Glenn Morshower as Aaron Pierce on 24 - He's been around to save the day so many times I don't even know where to start (and this is on a show full of heroic behavior). He and the First Lady conspired with Jack Bauer to bring down the scheming, lying President, who got a bunch of people killed. And even through all that, he nurses a crush on the First Lady, who also gets an honorable mention here - Jean Smart was BRILLIANT. I didn't know after Designing Women that she had it in her, but she was fabulous as the drugged out, slightly-crazy-but-not-that-crazy First Lady. So, after all this, you know Pierce is going to get a bullet next season. It's just the way of the show. :-(

Honorable Mentions: Say what you will about whether she's too thin or creepy or whatever, but I loved Marcia Cross as Bree on Desperate Housewives this season. She's slowly coming unglued, her son seduces her boyfriend, her daughter dates a killer, and her ex boyfriend knocks off her husband and then commits suicide (thinking she'll save him). First season, Bree was an annoying perfectionist. This season she's a woman in crisis. When she dropped Andrew off in the middle of the road, I was right there agreeing with her, because he'd finally crossed the line with me. Sure, she's an annoying mother to have, and she created the monsters her children have become, but you can't help feeling for her. I always love Terry O'Quinn as Locke on Lost, and you can make arguments for Sun and Jin, Rose and Bernard, Mr Eko, even the misguided Ana Lucia, in any comment on Lost heroes. But I love the battle between faith and logic in Locke's mind, and Mr. Eko's sheer faith in the hatch, the button, the island. That battle this season was one of the more interesting, even as most of it was done in words, not with guns or fists. And who could forget my favorite Supernatural boys? Jared Padalecki as Sam and Jensen Ackles as Dean, particularly Ackles, make my guilty pleasure show all the better-looking - I mean, better.

Job hunting tip of the day: If you think you're going to be laid off, raise the limit on your credit card (if you can handle credit wisely) or apply for another card - just for backup in case the search takes longer than unemployment will assist you. Also, apply for that computer credit - I would love a Dell laptop right now, but to pay monthly, I'd have to get approved first. I wish I'd done that while I still had a job!